How to Easily Build Meaningful Connections with Someone Special

Brian Miller is a magician and though this Tedx video shares how to connect with people to develop greater relationships and meaningful connections with people in your life.

The technique he shares is called Perspective Taking, where he takes on the perspective of the audience (or other person).Finding love and meaningful connections

Perspective Taking is the ability to see the world from the point of view of another person.  It sounds simple, but can be somewhat challenging to do unless you know how.

Magicians do it to connect with the audience, but why should you care?

On a personal level, he would meet people, but was never able to maintain a relationship.  Eventually, the communication would break down and people would leave and he would be alone.  He admits that it was mostly his fault.

People in his life didn’t feel as though he was invested in them.

It is not enough to care for someone and it’s not enough to understand them…. they have to feel understood.

They have to feel cared about.

So how do you do Perspective Taking?

There are two types of perspectives…. visual and emotional.

Magicians use mostly visual perspective…what does the audience see.

But in relationships, this is where the emotional perspective comes in.  And how do you do this?

Simply ask the other person.

By asking questions, you can change your tone and demeanor to be understood.

It is important to not simply ask questions, but to listen to the answers.  And listen with the goal of understanding, not with the goal of “hearing them out” or to respond or reply.

Too many people listen to find a break in the talking so that they can jump in and respond – that is not what you should be doing.  You should be trying to understand the person.

We are all guilty of “preparing what to say next” instead of actually listening, absorbing and understanding what the other person has to say.

Once you ask questions, listen to understand then you will find better, more meaningful connections in your life.

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Brian Miller is a private event magician, corporate keynote speaker, and
youth motivational speaker